I pray daily for each of my 4 kids. Yup, 4. But I find myself praying from a deeper place for my son Wilson. Wilson is my caring, fun, and handsome 8 year old Ethiopian. I’m crazy about the kid! (Note: I’ve shared about adoption before. Read this if you’re considering adoption.)
When I say that I pray from a deeper place for Wilson, I’m not even fully sure what I mean. I’ve just noticed over the last few months when I’m spending time in prayer (I often write down my prayers). The first or second thing I pray for is Wilson. What do I write?
“Lord, please heal Wilson’s heart.”
I write these exact words down almost daily. The words come from a place that only a parent would understand. Aching and petitioning as I write them. Not because his heart is terribly broken, but because I so badly want him to be made fully whole.
I’m 34 years old. I was raised and loved by my biological parents. I have no questions around who, what, when, where, why, and how my life got started. And yet even still, I’ve struggled with my worth and identity as long as I can remember. I can only imagine the things he’s wrestled with and will have to wrestle with. Having so many questions, but very few answers.
I see him wrestling when he questions our love for him. Something our other kids have never had to wrestle with. I see him wrestle when someone points out the obvious differences between him and the rest of our family. I see him wrestle when he shuts down for this or that reason. And my heart… aches for him.
Again, just to be clear, Wilson is a great kid. He’s doing so well in school. Our family wouldn’t be complete without him. He’s loved by truly everyone. Also, Bec and I are learning how to better parent him. We meet with a Christian counselor who specializes in adoption.
But each day I pray for him.
Praying that God would heal Wilson’s heart in only a way that God can.
I pray that before any place else he would find his identity in Christ.
I pray that he would know he’s loved. So much.
I pray that he would be proud of where he comes from. Knowing that mom and dad are too.
I pray that in his unanswered questions he’d find God’s peace.
I pray that he would know it’s okay to ask questions.
I pray that God would protect him from the words and questions of others.
I pray that God would use him and his story in a powerful way!
I pray for his biological mom. That somehow she would know he is loved and is an amazing young man.
I pray that I would be filled with kindness and gentleness toward him when things aren’t easy.
I pray that God would heal his heart.
Love you Wilson Weber.